Monday, November 08, 2010

In Which I Torture My Mother

So my mom has a thing for giraffes lately. (Don't ask.) She bought a ceramic giraffe on vacation and recently bought a little stuffed giraffe that she adores. A couple weeks ago, my parents came to visit and she--for some reason--brought her new, beloved giraffe to show us. Then...she accidentally left it here.

The phone rang later that night and it was Mom telling me that she'd left her giraffe behind and asking me to take good care of it until the next time we see each other. I assured her I would, hung up, and passed the message on to my husband and son.

Then, because I'm slightly sick in the head, I said, "What if we take a bunch of pictures of us not taking very good care of the giraffe and email them to her one day at a time?" We all liked that idea.

So every day I've been emailing my mother a picture of her giraffe with one line. Some examples:

We're taking good care of your giraffe, Mom!

The giraffe shouldn't have played in the driveway.

Giraffe...it's what's for dinner.

Send chocolate or the giraffe gets it.


You get the gist. The responses are even funnier. Emailed replies in all caps saying: LEAVE MY GIRAFFE ALONE! Or phone calls like, "There'd better not be one mark on my precious, lovely giraffe." (My mother's from Ireland so picture that in her lilting accent.)

So we've put the giraffe outside, under my tire, in the oven, in the microwave, held it over the toilet, held a knife to its throat, and my son sat on it. I'll be seeing my parents again in two weeks and will have to return the giraffe. But until then the fun is ON. We're running out of ideas though, so feel free to post some in the comments!

Update: My parents have set a revenge plan in motion which involves a wrapped but unidentified Christmas present being tortured in various ways. The first picture showed the present being run over by my mom on her bike. The second showed the present being slammed in a car door. So...if you think I'm deranged, now at least you know where I got it from. :)